Past Me is Trying to Stop Me Giving Up

“The struggle you’re in today is developing the strength you need for tomorrow. Don’t give up.” I just found this post-it stuck on a magazine that I never got round to reading during an horrific 6 month stay in hospital. The quote, written in my hand, couldn’t be more apt; right now I don’t want… Continue reading Past Me is Trying to Stop Me Giving Up

The Respect Lacking from the Mental Health System

The more that I come into contact with ‘the system’, the more I discover the disturbing and unforgivable lack of respect held for patients. It should be a core tenet of a system looking after human beings that each person is treated with the respect that everyone deserves. If that one aim is not achieved,… Continue reading The Respect Lacking from the Mental Health System

Heart-Aching Sadness

I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to adequately describe this feeling. This combination of sadness, fear, panic, despair plus something that I can’t put my finger on which pierces me to my core, making me certain that I can’t carry on. There is something horribly wrong with me, something scary, something bad enough that… Continue reading Heart-Aching Sadness

Fading Away

I feel like I’m fading away right now. Well, I’ve been fading away for a very long time, but there was a brief period recently where a tiny bit of my solidity and colour seemed to be coming back. But those tiny bits of progress seem to have eroded and the fading resumed this past… Continue reading Fading Away