Tonight I started putting together a positive scrapbook…I’ve never ‘scrapbooked’ before, and the inherent lack of uniformity or defined ‘perfection’ has always stopped me starting one because these things send my anxiety and self-judgement haywire. But I jumped in this evening – I was already feeling out of control and consumed with self hatred, so I figured I didn’t have much to lose!
I always come across pretty things that I want to do something with, so this achieves that aim combined with some enforced and focused positivity…none of my usual stuff allowed here (I have plenty of space for that elsewhere), just the good.
I don’t know where this is going – I’m not sure if I even like where it’s started – but let’s see.
Things are ghastly and I am struggling horribly, but I’m proud of myself for this little achievement. I’ve started with hope because that seems to be the key to keeping fighting mental illness, a key which has so far eluded me. So this reminder to actively grasp on to and create hope seemed the perfect way to open this new book.
Keep hold of any glimmer of hope you can find, folks. And if you can’t muster it for yourself, let someone else hold it for you until it becomes more tangible and real.
Love to you all xxx