The Not Knowing Stance

A great example of why mentalizing is important. A balance of considering the self and the other in someone’s actions or responses: try not to assume that someone’s actions or reactions are because of you, but think about what might be going on for them. This especially shows the importance of the ‘Not Knowing Stance’, where one has to assume that they can never know what is going on for the other person, thus has to invoke curiosity rather than assumption. This makes interpersonal relationships so much easier and reduces the potential for conflict and misunderstandings.

Absolutely key to Mentalization Based Treatment, of which I am very fortunate to be undergoing in an intensive rehabilitation iinpatient service. I am almost 14 months in and for the first time am seeing significant positive change and hope for the future.

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