*Trigger Warning – Self Harm* 10 human stitches 5 hours in A&E 4 family visitors 3 hugs from a psych liaison nurse 2 bags of donated presents And maybe a blood transfusion soon. Merry Christmas! 😂 Advertisements
***TRIGGER WARNING: Suicidal Ideation and Self Harm*** I wrote this the night before a very close call with death, to try to help explain to those helping me what I feel and experience – why I had to sacrifice my life. “I’m terrified at the moment that any sort of hope or progress is going… Continue reading The Monster and Me
WARNING: DISCUSSION OF THE THOUGHT PROCESSES SURROUNDING SELF HARM AND SUICIDAL IDEATION – PLEASE TAKE CARE READING ON IF YOU MIGHT BE TRIGGERED OR UPSET BY THIS As I start typing this, it’s 2am, and I’ve only just finished a 3 hour conversation with the person working the ‘waking night’ shift at my placement, who… Continue reading How Does This All Work?
Anniversaries are always really hard for me and take a massive toll on my mental health. Another year from the post below and 2 from the events discussed I feel more broken, more hopeless, guiltier, more self-hatred and more ashamed than ever. It still feels like it should have worked 2 years ago for the… Continue reading Now 2 Years on, Reflecting Again on “A Year On – Where Am I?”
Recently, the manager of my local crisis team was invited to talk to post graduate nurses working in mental health and A&E about service user involvement in care planning/risk assessments and suicide prevention. She asked if she could use my case as an example both of how badly things can go wrong in this area… Continue reading What it is like to not be involved in risk management, care planning or significant decisions in mental health care
Trigger Warning: Suicide I won’t go in to specific details (although elements – but not all – will be easily deduced) but on Friday I fully intended to take my own life and made a very serious attempt at doing so…just a week after my last attempt. After 3 days on a High Dependency Unit… Continue reading Liver Damage
It’s a funny time at the moment: I’m waiting to move in to a new placement which is described as: “a 24-hour CQC-registered accommodation service for adults who experience severe mental distress. Residents have multiple and complex needs and are entering the service from high-level support and secure settings or as an alternative to hospital… Continue reading Living in Limbo