Tomorrow has become a bit of an unwieldy beast: 11am Review with Senior Recovery Worker 1.30pm House Meeting 2pm Interviewing New Staff 2pm Session with in-house OT Hoping that overnight I learn how to split myself in to 3 😂 times will be changed but that itself is panic-worthy! ALL THE STRESS in one day.
****Trigger Warning: Discussion of Suicide Attempts and Their Aftermath**** On this day, a year ago, my heart stopped beating. I had been in a psychiatric hospital for 4 months and my mental distress was at such a height – combined with not a single drop of hope – that I decided both that I… Continue reading A Year On – Where Am I?
Currently, I’m struggling massively and am very unwell. I’ve started so many posts or thought of so much that I want to write about, but just haven’t been able. It’s a fight to see each hour through. It’s a fight to continue breathing. It’s a fight that I don’t know that I want to win.… Continue reading Without Hope and Too Unwell to Write
It can’t get much worse than that, right? At least you’re not wasting tissues. Wrong, it can get worse: the longest snot stalactite known to man could make an appearance, blowing in the wind until you have a snot scarf to match your tear balaclava. This is the glamorous reality of my life with mental… Continue reading Bum in a Puddle, Crying
Trigger warning: suicidal ideation (please take care!) Today my care coordinator saw me for the first time in what must be approaching two and a half months, after being unwell herself. It is no understatement to say that this woman is the reason I’m still breathing today, having somehow broken through those otherwise indestructible walls… Continue reading The Woman Responsible For Me Still Breathing